Tuesday, March 13, 2012

2012 Oahu Glorious Wonders Remake Hollywood Classic

This year Hollywood will remake 21 Jump Street, Total Recall, Red Dawn (why for God's sake?) and The Great Gatsby. Meanwhile, the 2012 Oahu Glorious Wonders will create their own version of that venerable tale of frustration and lost innocence, Platoon.

SPOILER ALERT: Reading past this point will reveal key details of the upcoming season.

Starting Lineup
C- Nick Hundley/A. J. Pierzynski- Catching was a weak spot in 2011 and the Wonders were looking to upgrade. Hundley, in his third year with the team, bounced back with a solid hiting performance and Pierzynski was acquired in the draft to replace long gone Jason Kendall. Looks like a solid combination this year for the Glorious Ones.
1B-Prince Fielder- The TBA Career Batting Leaders has not been updated on the TBA website (hint, hint) but rumor has it that Prince is the league's 2nd leading HR hitter. He should have another productive year in 2012, however Amalgmated Field's towering right field wall could prove problematic.
2B- Neil Walker/Angel Sanchez- Another platoon. Why? Because Walker struggles against lefties (and he's not really all that great versus right handers either). Still, he's got above average range and sure hands, so things could be a lot worse. Sanchez, a singles hittler who can also play short and third will give the team some late inning defensive options.
3B- Pablo Sandoval/Willie Harris- See above. Pablo, for all his solid defens and switch hitting wonderfulness, like Walker, turns turn jello versus lefties. Harris, on the other hand, handle righties OK, but lacks Sandoval's power.
SS- Alexei Ramirez/Hanley Ramiriez- See above and above that. For the second year in a row, the Ramirez brothers share the short stopping duties. This time, Alexei has the glove and Hanley hits the lefties.
LF- Shelley Duncan, Reed Johnson, Jonny Gomes, Willie Harris- Hard to believe, but yes, all these fellas will see at least a 200 PAs worth of playing time this year.
CF- Alex Presley, Bryan Peterson, Denard Span- see above.
RF- Garrett Jones, Carlos Quentin- see above and above and above and above etc. etc. etc.

Bench

C- Ivan Rodriguez- With his rifle arm, he should provide solid defensive backup come September.
1B- Shelley Duncan- Put Duncan in the right situation and he's a very dangerous man. He could see some PAs in clutch situations in homer friendly ballparks on the road. In other words, he's been expecting to keep the dugout bench warm most of the season.
OF- Martin Prado, nursing a bad bat, will likely see little playing time this year.

Starters
#1 Doug Fister
#2 Josh Collmenter
#3 Guillermo Moscoso
#4 Anibal Sanchez
#5 Tim Stauffer
#6 Charlie Morton

Not a bad bunch, really. Pretty damn good by Wonder standards, actually. It's the team's first sub-4.00 ERA staff and Fister's the first sub-3.00 ERA starter in club history. (You can look it up…) Team defense will help these guys and so will Amalgamated Field, but will the club's hitters? Only time will tell.

Bullpen
With five lefties and six righties, it's a nice mix of specialists.

Jonathon Papelbone bounces back this year to handle the closer duties along with Brian Fuentes and Matt Lindstrom.

Steve Cishek will see most of his innings as the setup guy. He'll have help from minor league callups Josh Spence, Troy Patton, Jason Grilli and Anthony Varvaro. This bunch should hold most leads except against the strongest competition.

Jamie Wright, Phil Coke and Tom Gorzelanny will likely handle mop up duties.

Team Strengths: Nothing really stands out. Hitting, pitching and defense are all pretty good. Not much new to say.

Team Weakness:
That awful sound you hear coming from Amalgamated Field? It's the sound of wailing and gnashing of teeth eminating from the outfield. Can you say "platoon"? It's pretty ugly. The Wonders drafted 6 OFers to add to the 5 other OFers (or should it be MFers?) already on the roster plus they added Reed Johnson via trade and still the place is a mess. The team needs consistent run prodution from at least one of the OF positions but despite all the effort, it jus' ain't happenin'.

Overall: The idea was to load up the bases for Fielder and Sandoval to drive 'em home. Whether that happens is questionable. Amalgmated Field tends to be very unkind toward left handed home run hitters. There's talk of a new ballpark, but how can you give up that beautiful view of Pearl Harbor? (The team's IT and Graphics department may be called upon next year for a solution). Barring a blockbuster trade, it doesn't look like the team will produce enough runs this year.The starting pitching, bullpen and defense are all above average. But "pretty good" doesn't win championships. How this team fairs will likely depend on how well they can do against the weaker teams. If they make the playoffs, a lot will depend on their luck.

Prediction: 3rd Place in the LHL Vander Wal Division.

4 comments:

  1. If anyone can make all these platoons work, it's you. I'm not sure you'll know what to do with good pitching though!

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  2. You have as good a shot as anyone at the wildcard. Heck, I wouldn't rule you out winning the division. Reno, while still good, is not what it was last year. Delaware and Edgewater should be in the mix as well. There are 4 teams in that division that should contend for the playoffs.

    You know me. I love a good trade. Curious when/if you explore trade options to upgrade the OF.

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  3. The TBA is great!

    Oregon Beaver looks like this

    A solid pitching staff for a change.
    Mark Buehrle and Colby Lewis will be the aces of this staff I am counting on Jason Hammel , Philip Humber , Josh Tomlin to add bulk of the innings. The 6th starter on the staff will see alot of action for the year is Freddy Garcia and
    Jeff Niemann may see limited action but will add good innings.

    The Rolaids crew is better with closers Heath Bell and Javy Guerra that will be the head liners. Adding others that can do in relief none is better getting out the rhb is Sergio Romo and other will add to exciting yr in relief. Todd Coffey ,
    Edgmer Escalona , Chris Leroux , Clay Mortensen , Takashi Saito , Michael Stutes , Clay Hensley and Esmerling Vasquez will handle the chore at different times during the yr.

    At first base is Derek Lee (an original beaver) and Michael Morris. Waiting in the minors are Paul Goldschmidt and Jordan Pacheco for their turn but may see some action in the TBA this season.

    At second base is Ryan Theriot(another original beaver) and Orland Hudson a 2012 free agent draftee. Great defense and good on base average is a key for this positon.

    At third base is Placido Polanco and Daniel Descalso will give the opposition fits with their defense and good batting skills.

    At shortstop is Jimmy Rollins and Justin Sellers . Both will see action at this key postion and it is good to have Rollins for his defense.

    In leftfield is Juan Pierre and Chris Denorfia(who was one of original beaver) also seeing action here is Michael Morse when not playing firstbase.

    In centerfield is (another original beaver) Marlon Byrd and Endy Chavez another free agent draftee and late inning defense is Andres Torres. This maybe the weakest link in the lineup but don’t count on them to have an out every time at bat.

    In rightfield is Carlos Beltran(another original beaver) with Jose Constanza in the minors waiting for his chance and will be up some time this season

    At catcher Lou Marson and Bryan Pena will see most of the action at the backstop position. And along with Henry Blanco, Tony Cruz and Alfonzo Eliezer waiting for a chance to play and may get a chance sometime this season.

    Looks like this team will contend and may win the Championship of the TBA with a little luck.

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  4. The encyclopedia file is too big for that site now. I'm looking for another site to go too but haven't found one yet...

    ReplyDelete